Sleep. That’s all I want right now. I have not had enough. 5 hours of it for two days, then only 2 hours last night. I went to bed at 2 am, and got up at 4 am this morning. I got a call last night, no, actually I placed a call last night. To somebody who wants to remain anonymous. Even to people she doesn’t know? I understand why in some regard, but it was just funny listening to how concerned she was about her privacy. It was a relief to hear it from somebody else. Caffeine girl. I know that isn’t the most romantic and beautiful name ever, but it fits her. With the talk of coffee today and the daily Mountain Dews. We talked for 4 ½ hours. It’s amazing the conversations you can have with somebody when you don’t even really know them. It’s even more amazing how deep and emotional the conversation can get. It was really refreshing. I only wish I wasn’t so focused on work lately to appreciate everything she had to say. Because in the back of my head, I have the laptop in front of me, and I’m thinking about all I have to get done. I was really moved by some of the comments she made. She said things that I couldn’t have said better myself. Such as the reasons people want their own children, and are not just content with raising nieces and nephews. She just said things really well. It was impressive. You really can’t base somebody simply off of what you might see when you pass them, like in this case, I realized she was much deeper than I would have (and did) think at first glance. I hope to talk again, and I have no problem with her reading this site whenever her little heart desires.
I got two tickets to the Diamondback’s game today. My boss gave them to me. It was nice, because even the smallest things help make a difference now. She told me that if I hit the wall to be sure and call time out. I told her I hit the wall last week (see that Monday’s post). I have since been a little better. I just needed to get over this hump. And even though I have to send a report sometime this weekend, I feel better knowing that we accomplished a lot this week. And I was really appreciative of You’reTooWhiteForMe’s boss to help out. I know that I pretty much picked her to help me, but she could have thrown a fit and gotten out of it. She is a valuable asset, and it was really great to have somebody competent help. I asked her to come in at 5 am this morning, and even brought her Starbucks to help keep her happy. Well, I was able to work via VPN from home at 4:30, but when I got into work at 5 everything was down. The VoIP phones, the network, everything. I was pissed. I dragged my ass out of bed, to make sure we get the testing done for the Desktop Application. So, when nobody answers the HelpDesk pager, who do I call? Kolohegirl (not Ghostbusters). She was dead asleep, as it was early in Tacoma as well. She was all comfy in her hotel room bed, and I wake her up. I ask her for TDM’s cell phone and pager numbers, and she rattles them off. I was worried that I got the wrong numbers, as she was mumbling, and I could tell she was still asleep. Well, TDM answered his page. And while I was bitching about the fact that nobody answered the HelpDesk pager, he told me he was the one on call, and that it never went off. He was able to help start the motion on getting it all resolved, as it ended up being the Sprint circuit. I felt just as bad for waking him up, as I did Kolohegirl, but he stated he was grateful, as he would have had issues if the problem hadn’t been resolved (since the helpdesk pager wasn’t working). People no doubt would have held him accountable for the downtime, regardless of the fact that it wasn’t his fault. Still, it was only down for 2 hours. It was up by 7 am. The best part, is that even though she was still asleep and mumbling incoherently, and she doesn’t remember it, Kolohegirl called me back to make sure I got what I needed so I was able to resolve the issue. Now that is customer service…
Well, as you may or may not know, I start my posts in MS Word, add stuff here and there, then post them. Well, today is now a new day, as the above was written last night. I have since had 11 hours of sleep. However, just as I fell asleep I got another call from my Caffeine girl. We talked for another 4 hours. It was really great. Well, because I was asleep I had no problem opening up to her and saying how I really felt about things. 8 ½ hours of conversation in two days. It’s been really nice. And what is even better, is I’m able to say how I really feel about things, and it hasn’t been an issue. In fact, she understands why I feel the way I do. She asked a lot of personal questions, and surprisingly, I provided answers. We talked about the spelling of “a lot”, wine, hot air balloons, being in love with the idea of being in love, and movies. There is always a fear that I’ll scare her off, but if nothing else, I’ll appreciate the conversations we had, as they were very nice.
Batlover came over today. She called me and said, order the pizza, I’m coming over. I was like, okay then. The pizza guy came to the door and I answered wearing just a towel as I had just gotten out of the shower. I know, sexy, right? Well, it was better him than Batlover, as that would have made for an interesting conversation. She came over, we chatted and ate, and then laid down for awhile. We chatted while laying next to each other, then decided to head to Desert Ridge.
It was at Desert Ridge where I determined I must have been a female in my past life. I don’t even believe in past lives, but whatever. I just had the BEST time at Bath and Body Works. I walked out spending $50 on stuff. I’ve been in there several times before, as I love their soap, and I have to make sure it matches my towels (I must be metro sexual). I got a hand massage with the cocoa scrub and corresponding cream. All the different scents in lotions, body splashes and soaps was just exhilarating. It was hard not to want to try some of them all. Okay, I sound gay, I should stop now. But then again, there was cute chicks there, so that helped (just a comment to make me sound not quite so gay).
Oh, but at the Ulta store next door. That was where the hot chicks were. I mean, damn. Batlover dragged me in there, and proceeded to try the fingernail polish on me so she didn’t waste her money or screw up her own nails. I totally busted this woman who was trying to steal something, at least, so I think. She was like, “oh, how did that end up in there and not in the basket?” I was like, if your going to steal the shit, do a better job than that and stay out of Scottsdale you dumb bitch.
Well, as if she hadn’t dragged me to enough places, next was Ross. She wanted to see if she had a skirt there that she regretted not buying the other day. And of course, it wasn’t there. But that didn’t stop her from spending an hour there looking at clothes. She tried stuff on, several times over, made a few comments about how she couldn’t find anything that fit her. Poor her and that skinny, tight, hot body, with perfect breasts. Poor thing. Anyway, we went and had dinner at Rock Bottom Brewery. It was a pleasant dinner, as the entire day with her was really great. At the end she stunned me with a comment of “if I was to die be sure to console my parents, and be sure to let them know that they did a good job.” I of course said I would, and was stunned as the comment came out of nowhere. She then told me to make sure her animals are taken care of. And that is something that her and I have discussed several times. She knows that I would make sure they were safe and sound, and in a good loving home. Even if it was mine. Yes, I’m allergic to cats. But I’ve done it before and would do it again. Sometimes I think Jay doesn’t know what it is that he has. Actually, I know he doesn’t. What surprises me, is that he cares so much for her, but I know he doesn’t know the real her yet. I hope he does eventually. I’d want to see her taken care of, and I know he would do that. He’s a nice guy, no, not perfect, but he could take good care of her if it was to work out. So, after the discussion of her dreams of dying, and conversations about what it would be like if someone close was to pass away, we made our way home. We said our goodbyes, and I made sure to tell her to call me when she gets home. She of course forgot, but I called her and she apologized, as she got a call from a friend. I was just happy to know that she was safe. She finally gave me permission to post the following e-mail. It was something that she gave to me before I left on my first trip to Wisconsin for work. I’m not sure what made her change her mind, but I feel it was special, and I wanted to post it. She just didn’t want anybody to give her (or me) a hard time about it. It was for me, and this site is for me, so here was her e-mail on February 25th, 2004:
I will TRY to maintain my innocence while u are gone. no Promisies
JB-
As I sit here at my computer, dreading the bleak actuality that my sweet JB will be gone the entire weekend. Selfishly angry about the impending departure. Though I have others to call, the pleasure is not the same. I recall his tender lips. Knowing he is thumbing through his old black book and plans on "hiking" with some former match.com whore. He knows my secrets, that few know. Other women lead him with his own tie. He obeys like a circus dog, eager to please but never quite getting that tantalizing treat. So I sit, watching other women "grease his monkey" He knows I know, but still behind my smile, I still have many secrets. Surrounded by sound, sipping diet Dr. Pepper, he tries to convince himself to hate me. Truthfully, He craves me. Wanting to put me in a vile, next to the flowers on his shelf, so other may see and of course cannot touch. In the meantime he settles, spending "hundreds of dollars" on the female temple he sometimes arouses but never touches. He takes comfort in making my eyes and heart smile but sometimes asks himself, "what good does this do me????????"
Hope u like it. NO, u CANNOT put it on your site. your eyes only.
love, E xoooxxxx
She really is the best. She is just a sweet girl with a huge heart. Only she would stop and take the time to write comments on my guest bathroom mirror to scare off all the women that come over with stuff like: “XOXO”, “I Love JB”, “Make Me Your Wife”, “Give it to me” written in red lipstick. And she’s got the best one liners of anybody I know. Although they are R rated at the very least, here’s a few that are credit to her:
“what the fuck good is that going to do you and me, bitch?” –needs to be said when somebody says that someday you will find someone who will appreciate you.
“you have time for your tasty bitches, but not your friends”
“I’ve got a fire between my legs and I need your hose to take care of it” – ironic she’s dating a firefighter
“my pussy is so tight, it’s like you are fucking a virgin”
“Goddamn it” – needs to be said slowly and with great agony and sexual tension while pulling her hair and biting her neck
“fucking Wyatt”
“fucking insert name here”
“blah, blah, blah, blah”
“all that work, and you didn’t even get your dick sucked?!?”
It’s tough to write such things, as it portrays only a small part of her. That just shows how crazy and entertaining she can be. And writing it doesn’t do it justice, as most probably see it as trivial and/or juvenile. There is so much to her that most don’t realize. And that is most certainly not the best part. For that would be the love that she gives to those that touch her heart and appreciate who she is and what she has to offer…
Okay, changing the subject completely, back to the more innocent and sweet Caffeine girl, she called me this evening. Jay and Batlover would be proud that I didn’t call her back. Whatever, although I don’t think of it as playing games, I understand what Jay was saying. In fact, she stated she was kicking herself asking why I hadn’t called a few hours earlier. As she would have loved to have gone out tonight. Contrary to what Batlover thought, which was that she said she couldn’t just to look like she had a life. Not all people are like that, in fact, I like to think that most are not. The conversation was not the normal four hours. In fact, it ran only about an hour (if not a little less). She stated that she wanted to go out next weekend for my birthday. I remember making the comment when I first met her that it was ironic that her birthday is exactly one month after mine. I love the fact that she lives in Scottsdale, as she is familiar with a lot of the places that I like to go. She’s even heard of Michael’s at the Citadel. It is a great place to go to brunch on Sundays. I just love talking to her. It’s crazy. The conversations we have, I just find them amazing. It’s kind of weird because we haven’t had time to chat like that in person. I can’t wait until this weekend, as that will be a great time I’m sure. Sometimes I think the topics of conversation would scare somebody away. But for me, it doesn’t. I’m in love with the idea of being in love, and to hear somebody that shares the same thoughts is nice. She’s a romantic. I explained how I’ve gotten to where I am, JenJen, Cookie, JB. She really didn’t have much to say about that. And probably so, as it is in the past. One should be looking toward the future. Okay, I’ll say it one last time: I love talking to her.
I’m taking Cookie to the baseball game tomorrow. I know, probably not the first person I should ask (and she wasn’t), but I knew she would go regardless of it being Easter, and I know she would enjoy it. In fact, Christy was the first person I asked as she saw the tickets and stated she had never been to a baseball game. But it’s probably for the better that she didn’t go, as that would cause a stir. Although she said yes at first, she had to take it back a little while later, as it was Easter, and after church she was having dinner at her sister’s place in Queen Creek. Like I said, probably a good thing. I even hinted it to Caffiene girl, but she wasn't able to attend as it was Easter. So, I'll go with Cookie, and I know I'll have a good time.
Well, the director of Enrollment is moving to San Diego. She is taking a title and pay cut and will be working for Jim. She stated that since she moved to AZ (about 30 years ago) she has wanted to leave the state. Now she has the opportunity for the company to pay for it. I would love to work for Jim, so I can’t blame her for doing it. She stated that there becomes a time in your life where money isn’t as important as happiness. I’m not there yet, I still want the money. I’ll be there someday though. Well, who do you think is next in line and will very likely become a director? Cookie. She is perfect for the job, and although she has to interview with a VP of Corp Ops (who we both used to report to) and a few directors first (our friends), an Executive VP next(an old ex-military guy), an HR VP (kinda mean) after that, then the CEO (great, smart, amazing, charasmatic guy), I know she can handle it and will be successful. She is just that good. And the overwhelming support she has gotten from the current director(our friend), as well as other directors(other friends), VPs(ex-boss and friend of our friends), and even the staff that would be reporting to her is great. I think she’s got it pegged, but I don’t want to jinx it. She was excited today because she was going to buy suits to get her all ready. She is looking forward to the process, which is a great sign.
I sent the following e-mail to Jim the other day:
Just to fill you in, your fan club is growing. I have an online journal that I post to, and a few close people read the inner most secrets of my life. A few of whom work, (and used to work) at TW.
Well, some of these people have these web logs too, and although I mention you often, I just wanted to fill you in on their thoughts:
I'm glad Saturday is over. We had all day training for the new employees. Yeh big production. In short, we pulled it off. It was like an odd union of field and corporate employees. Training, HR, CCC. I got to experience the greatest that is Jim. He gained a few more fans - and I'm sure he does have a fan club. I'm not so much wowed as everyone else but yeh, he is charismatic to say the least.
They went on later to talk about the tulips and such, but that was your section. Give them time and I'm sure they'll be completely "wowed". You rock, just wanted you to know that others think so too. And in case you didn't know, if there is a fan club, I'd be the leader!
See you when you get back to Phoenix. Take Care.
He stated that he didn’t want to be a subject in life, that he wants to be a participant. He appreciated the sentiments, and found it valuable to know that his efforts were on the right track. He asked more about the online journal, which I filled him in on (minus the link), and apologized if I was difficult at work lately, because the stress was killing me. Although the author of the comments (Kolohegirl) was floored that I would send him such a thing, I couldn’t resist filling him in. I was just having the conversation the other day, that I don’t know anybody that doesn’t like him. He just has that charm and charisma, and he is a great guy to work with. Him, like Terry, and even Eric sometimes are just great to be around.
Well, I haven’t heard from Terry, and we have some catching up to do on some work stuff. I’m trying to leave him alone this weekend so he can spend some quality time with his fiancé. I’d like to go out to dinner with him some night. We can chat more about wine and other things, and it would be a great conversation. We joked about Maria (You’reTooWhiteForMe’s boss) having a last name that was French, and he spoke of the few things he knew could say in French. He stated that there was even a wine named ménage a trois. It makes one wonder how it got its name. I’m sure it’s just a mixture of three berries or something, not as exciting as one would hope. I had a busy day on Friday, and I didn’t CC him on any of the e-mails that I sent. So I have a lot to fill him in on when I do talk to him. There have been few work e-mails floating around, so it looks like I’m not the only one taking the weekend off (well, at least working very minimally).
Okay, it’s almost 2:00 am. Hey, tomorrow (Monday) is my birthday! I’m going to call it a night and get into my nice comfy bed. Sweet Dreams…
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